I DON'T HEART HUCKABEE

The Top 10 Reasons for Moving to Canada If Mike Huckabee Becomes President

1. Yeah, yeah, yeah... so you lost 200 pounds... so spend some money and either buy a few new suits or fucking have them taking in a bit. Don't they have tailors in Arkansas?!?!

2. If you believe in Creationism, that the Earth

is only 4,000 - 6,000 years old, and that the Baby Jesus had a pet dinosaur, then you probably shouldn't be allowed to set national standards for the education of future generations.

3. After eight years of a fundamentalist Christian President who thought he was having conversations with God, wouldn't electing another Fundamentalist Religious Extremist for another 4 to 8 years classify the U.S.A. as a possible "terrorist state"

4. Chuck Norris is your celebrity endorsement, seriously!?!? Yeah, Oprah is a total assbag and may be campaigning for Obama, but that's completely (well, mostly) negated by George Clooney, Ed Norton, Steven Colbert, Halle Berry and Sharon Stone.

5. Three words:

"Former Baptist Minister".

6. In at least three stump speeches, Huckabee has proclaimed the sacradness of "supporting the right of families to raise their children, not the government". Yet, the son he raised, was prosecuted for capturing, torturing, hanging and discmboweling a stray puppy... while on a Boy Scout Camping Trip! That's a "Christian Father of the Year!" award waiting to happen.

7. When Benazir Bhutto was assasinated, he didn't seem to know exactly where in the world Pakistan was located. (Perhaps somewhere between Jericho and the gates of hell... as described in the Old Testament??)

8. Seriously, all of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered America are really sick to death of being villified, scapegoated and treated as second-class citizens.

9. His name prophetically rhymes with "DumbFuckABee".

10. Canada has legalized Same-Sex Marriage and Marijuana... Why are we still here?!?!?!